The title of this composition is a line from “Will” Shakespeare’s play, “Henry V.” King Henry spoke those words to his troops to encourage them to flood the “breach” in the Harfleur city wall (Harfleur being a city in France) which… They did. Yet those words hold a deeper meaning for me this ungodly hot and humid evening in Swarthmore, PA. They’re echoing in my mind as I sit here, typing on my Jetpack app because my computer is currently processing a hundred or so updates. Not my new PC, but my old one. The one I was using when I completed and self-published CHILDREN OF ENDWORLD over six years ago. It was the same PC I was using when I started writing HEAVEN AND ENDWORLD that same year. I finished the initial draft of that book back in 2021. It is now 2025 and I’ve barely touched said story in four years. Oh, I’ve toyed with it–as every writer does–but life, work et al got in my way.
No longer.
In just under two months, I am turning 50. 50. WOW. There was a time I never thought I’d reach 45, nay 50. When life throws you lemons sometimes you are unable or unwilling to make lemonade. Sometimes it’s easier to embrace a distraction or five. And I’ve had plenty of those over the last, four years. I am not bitter, nor am I upset or angry at myself. Divorce is… Hard. Don’t let anyone EVER tell you differently. Kids and their lives take up a lot of time when you’re a single parent. You don’t have much time to think about yourself, nay the book series you’ve been working on for over 30 years. Yet through it all… Through the nights spent sitting outside a dance studio in my car, or squeezing errands in between kid activities, something always felt like it was missing. My mind kept returning to William MacNuff and his brethren. His FRIENDS. It kept returning to where I left them six years ago and again, four years ago in the pages of a novel only a handful of beta readers have read. His story… MY story, begged me for completion. And yet I dallied.
No longer.
It is time, friends. I have just under two months until my 50th Birthday. I need to complete The ENDWORLD Series before then. Fortunately, the damn thing is basically done, and what I need to add/subtract has been on my mind for the better part of the last four years. Whether I’ll be able to complete AND publish it by August 20, 2025 remains to be seen. Survey says? Unlikely. I haven’t reached out to my editor, nor my cover artist yet. But I’m sure as shit going to try. People have been telling me for years that there comes a point in life when you have to start thinking about yourself. I guess this is a PART of what I am doing now. Yet it’s not just about me. I’m thinking about YOU, as well. Those of you reading this post did something for me that I am and will always be beyond grateful for. I put something out into the universe (as a good friend told me recently) and you read it. You spent your hard-earned money on it. Many of you enjoyed it. To deny you the end of William’s story is selfish. You deserve to know it as well as I do. So, let’s find out how it ends together, shall we?
I have teenage daughters, so I love a good selfie. Here’s one of me, right now. Will this be my new author photo? Probably not. I’d wager no one wants to see me rocking a tank top, much less marvel at my crow’s feet, receding hairline or my blonde/brown/white Van Dyke. I have a photo selected for my author one. Multiple photos actually (no spoilers guys and gals; sorry). But I wanted to capture this moment, here at the start of the end of all things The ENDWORLD Series. I’m relatively sure about that statement with one caveat: HEAVEN AND ENDWORLD is the end of William’s story. Whether there are other stories beyond it I do not know. I have ideas, but I’ll keep the cart BEHIND the horse at this time. We’ll see what the Muse inspires in the days and years to come.
One last picture. This is the room where it’ll happen and the computer it’ll happen on. This may look familiar to some but not to all of you reading this. When I first moved here to Swarthmore, PA, I set up this area in my living room to be my writing station. This is different than my WORK station which is… Much more elaborate–lots of tech and lots of knick-knacks. But when I think back to where I was sitting when I typed those infamous, first words in ENDWORLD – A Novel–“It’s difficult to remember a time when my life had meaning”–this feels RIGHT. Simplistic. A return to something that I once was and have not been for many, many decades. Just me, a computer, a charging station for my phone and a glass of Liquid IV (I’m far beyond glasses of sugared up iced tea and hot dogs now; my body is simply not built to process them anymore). We’ll see how the kids react to me usurping their living room.
So? What’s left? Nothing save for a computer restart and the opening of my WIP. The rest will WITH LUCK be committed to the annals of self-published, literary history. Fingers crossed. Prayers prayed. I chose the title of this piece because that quote, “once more unto the breach” has been haunting me for a few weeks now. But I didn’t choose it because I am a king, planning to rally my troops to take a city… ANY city. I chose it because that guy I once was–the once-English major–interprets it as someone or SOMEONES facing a particularly daunting task after a previous attempt has been made. I’ve made many attempts to complete The ENDWORLD Series over the years. As it once was. As it is now. As I hope it will be forevermore.
Time to get to it. Wish me luck!
FM.
THE ENDWORLD SERIES 